Weeklong Catnip Rager - #SpaWeekend Recap

Of course it was Patrice the Leopard who originally said that we should take our Catnip Ball pawty down to The Golden Door Spa in San Diego for the weekend. She said she read about it on the internet back in Nairobi before she flew into LA, and has been dying to try it. It’s LADIES ONLY so @MarleyKatz couldn’t come. Boo-freakin’-hoo.

Patrice don’t mess around, so she made sure she smuggled in a few catnip balls. I love that gal!

When we checked in, there was this New Age Music playing everywhere, but Patrice is a Punk Rock fan and she’s all, “Um, ROAR!” and they immediately put on a 70s punk mix for her. Ramones, The Clash, that kind of thing. The blue-hairs didn’t seem to like it, but screw ‘em. It’s our world and they’re just living in it.

It’s good to be the Leopard.

We got adjoining suite so we could keep the pawty going. Patrice got into her luxurious silk-and-terry robe and tipped over to my suite to get going on the catnip. WASTED!

Then we tipped over to the pool and hot tub. Patrice got a running start and cannonballed into the hot tub, scaring away all the blue-hairs so we had the tub to ourselves for while, but then these three tigers, Phyllis, Claudette and LaDonna showed up:

They seemed like fun gals, so we invited them back to the room for a catnip session. Holy noms, what a blast! More on these three later, as I’m also trying to recruit them for my #CatFish

So then it was dinnertime, so the five of us tip on over to the dining hall there. Madonne! You should have seen the bunny food they were trying to pass off as dinner. For pete’s sake!

The five of us just looked at each other and we slunk on out. Fortunately, the spa is nestled in the wild hills outside San Diego, and there were plenty of coyotes for them and field mice for me. Every time they took down a coyote, I was all, “Payback’s a BITCH, ain’t it?” Ha, did it for the lulz.

Anyway, back to the room for more catnip with the girls and then off to bed.

Day Two was just about spa treatments. We were supposed to get up early and go on a daybreak hike, but screw that noise. We started out with a quick yoga class.

Yoga Kitteh was our instructor and she was great; really got me ready for a long hard day of lounging around.

We lounged around the pool a bit until out masseuses were ready for us. I had:

• Swedish Massage
• Thai Massage
• Swedish-Thai Massage
• Hot Stone Massage
• Shiatsu Massage
• Rolfing
• Deep-tissue Massage
• Aromatic Salt Glow
• Balancing Mud Moor Bath 
• Cleopatra Steam Infusion 
• Firming Algae Body Wrap 
• Herbal Volcanic Heat Wrap
• Vichy Power Exfoliation 
• Chakra Awakening & Rebalancing
• Heartworks Lomi Lomi Massage 
• Holistic Aromatherapy Massage 
• Ignite Your Spirit Healing 
• Lymphatic Body Massage
• Reflexology
• Reiki
• Trigger Point Therapy 
• Watsu

Stressful day! Totally exhausting. Anyway, after dinner and some more nip, we slept like a couple of kittens.

The next day before checking out we did a quick yoga class with a different instructor who was a pug. 

Normally, I wouldn’t tolerate having a pug run a class in anything, but this little lady really knows her Cobra Pose as you can see.

After that we went to check out. The lady at the desk is all, “That’ll be $22,000,” and Patrice is all, “Um… ROARRRRRRRR!!!” and the lady is all, “Have a nice day, come again.”

It’s good to be the leopard.